A New Home
by Gixie
Summary: My name is Mikan Sakura. Hotaru and my parents died a little while ago, so to get away from the memories that haunt me, I'm moving town to go to Alice Academy boarding school, but when I got there, I realized this was no ordinary school, RukaxMikan
1. Chapter 1 Going to Alice Academy

Summary: My name is Mikan Sakura. Hotaru, and my parents died in a car crash a little while ago, so to get away from the memories that haunt me, I'm moving town to go to Alice Academy boarding school. Unfortunately, my life there didn't turn out exactly as I wished it too. RukaxMikan Non Alice

I reckon there are not enough RukaxMikan pairings so I decided to do it, plus it is my favorite pairing!

Mikan is 16 years old in this and in year 10.

No Alice's in this story.

&

A New Home

Chapter 1 – Going to Gakuen Alice

Mikan's Pov

When dawn came, I was waiting outside of my apartment with a small suitcase which contained my clothes and money. I couldn't believe all the event's that had happened which brought me up to here.

I remembered I was always so happy, so cheerful. Hotaru was always cold, but I could see through that. Everything she did had done had been for a purpose. She honestly cared about me, even though she hadn't once told me. No words were needed to be communicated between us, but now, no words could be communicated between us again. All that was left of her was memories, memories that could soon be forgotten or start to fade.

It had been a rainy day, and I was stuck at home alone. My parents went to pick up Hotaru seeing as her parents were busy. I remember that after 30 minutes that they had been gone I felt that something didn't feel right. Something was off. It was all hazy after that. The door bell rang and I rushed to open it. There standing outside was a police officer. He told me my parents and Hotaru had been in an accident. I was in denial. It couldn't be real. It was all a dream, but somehow I knew it was not. It was all real.

He tried to bring me to an orphanage, but I decided I would go to the Alice Academy boarding school where I could live for two years until I became 18, which would mean I would be a legal adult.

So that was a really quick version of what brought me up to here waiting for that stupid taxi to arrive.

But just as I thought that, a taxi turned the corner and stopped right in front of me. Talk about great timing. I quickly greeted the taxi driver and got in, telling him where I needed to go.

I sank back into the seat, and looked outside. The sky was a nice orangy red color that looked beautiful. But it just didn't feel right for everything to be so bright when the three people I loved most were three metres underground.

'Hotaru, mum, dad' I thought sadly, my eyes were brimming with tears. It had only been a week ago that all this had happened and there was not one part of me that had moved on. I often had flashbacks of them which usually made people worried about me, since I was sort of in a trance, but somehow I felt content when I had them. But after I had them was a totally different story.

I think I soon drifted off to sleep, I'm not quite sure, but one minute we were heading out of town, the next minute we were pulling up outside a gate. I sleepily wiped the sleep away from my eyes and dull fully looked at the academy.

My eyes grew wide. Alice academy was huge! There were numerous buildings, which all had at least three storey's to each one. The grass was maintained with not one patch of dirt showing.

I was literally stunned. I thought Alice Academy would be like a little shack or something like it, but never in my mind did I think of something as good as this! I felt a stab of regret hit me that Hotaru didn't get to see this either.

I stepped outside the taxi, while grabbing my suitcase and walked to the edge of the gate. As I walked I grew more and more nervous. I knew I shouldn't be, there was nothing to be nervous about. It was just a boring school. I tried to tell myself that I didn't have any right to be nervous when Hotaru was gone, but it didn't help.

I heard the taxi drive off, but otherwise didn't take notice in it. At the side I pressed the intercom hesitantly.

"Yes?" A voice said. I gulped nervously.

"Uh.. I'm Mikan Sakura," I said into the intercom feeling a little stupid.

"Oh, You're the new student!" The voice said excitedly. "We don't usually get new students, hold on, Ill open the gate for you,"

The gate opened. In a weird sort of way, it made me feel like a princess. I slowly walked in and was met with a blonde haired woman with a skirt on.

She rushed to me and took my hands, a smile graced her face.

"Mikan, you're the first new student in ages, did you know that?" She said excitedly. I felt a pang in my chest. She was so like me before the incident, it was unbelievable!

"No miss," I stated emotionless. It felt as if I would break down if I tried to smile. The woman's smile faulted.

"Uhmm," She said laughing really awkwardly. I blinked. Was I really that freaky.

"I'm a guy," He said finally. If I was drinking something, I would have choked, but since I wasn't I just gapped. Now that I thought about it, as I stared at him, I started to see the more defined features of a man.

"Oh," I said blankly shocked. But before I knew it, the cross dresser started cackling madly.

"You're the first one to think I was a woman!" He said in between laughs. I turned away from him, sure that my face was red.

"Sh-Shut up," I muttered. He soon quietened down and dragged me down the hallway towards where I suppose the dormitories are.

"I'm going to be you're homeroom teacher. My name is Narumi," He stated, and started to hum. I rolled my eyes, but inwardly his happy mood was a little refreshing.

We moved through the hallway's. On the way, Narumi told me there are two people to a room but soon afterwards, Narumi suddenly stopped as if he remembered something surprising.

"Oh, I forgot," He said sheepishly while rubbing the top of his head. I frowned. Forgot what?

Narumi suddenly looked at me with a look that clearly said 'uh oh' for me.

"What is it?" I asked suddenly wary and cautious.

"Well, there was a little incident in one of the girls room. We have to keep them in the room you were going to have," He started. I felt a pit in my stomach. I think I knew where this was heading too.

"So, the only spare bed we have left is in the boys dormitories," I stared at Narumi sensei in horror. What would happen if I was with some pervert?

I think Narumi Sensei saw my stricken face because he quickly added on that the boy I was with was very nice. That calmed my nerves down a tiny bit.

In the end, Narumi left me standing at the door to one of the boys rooms. Stupid Narumi said he had business to run too, so he just had to leave me here.

I lazily brought my hand up and knocked. There was a small groan from inside before I heard scuttling feet. The door opened and I saw a blonde haired boy with glasses on staring back at me with surprise.

"Hello," He said blinking. I hesitated. At least he wasn't some pervert.

"Hello," I said fidgeting, not exactly sure how to tell him I would be living with him for two years. We stared at each other, until he noticed my suitcase. His jaw went slack.

"Um... I think I'm you're dorm partner," I said after much courage.

"Ehh?"He yelped before calming down slightly. I shifted on my feet. The boy then smiled and grabbed my suitcase before seemingly inviting me in. At least he was well mannered.

"I'm Yuu Tobita, the 2B class representative," Yuu shyly said to me.

"I'm Mikan Sakura," I said back to him. There was much tension in the air after that but I tried not to think about it.

"Narumi Sensei brought you here then?" Yuu prompted.

"Y-yeah, I though he was a woman," I mumbled the last part under my breath but unfortunately, Yuu heard and started laughing hysterically. That definitely broke the tension.

"Seriously? No one has ever thought that before," Yuu said gasping for breathe. "My friends would all be hysterical if I told them that," I jumped and looked at Yuu somewhat betrayed. I didn't like being laughed at to me, after opening my heart to Yuu if only a tiny bit felt like being betrayed.

Something on my face must have shown him how much it disturbed me.

"I won't tell, this will be just between us," Yuu promised and for some reason, I didn't doubt him.

A bell suddenly rang and I looked at Yuu questioningly.

"Ahh, breakfast time," Yuu said brightly and started coming towards me, but before I could stop him he put his hand on my shoulder shocking me. Oh god, I was going to have a flashback!

"Come..." I didn't hear anything else he said.

"_Hotaru," I yelled, "Meanie!" Hotaru glared at me coldly, but somehow I knew my talking was refreshing to her. I quickly ran up to her and put an arm around her shoulder, who instantly hit me in the arm a little harder than normally. I cried out, holding my arm painfully._

"_Hotaru," I whined, clutching at my arm, hopeless tears started to fall from my eyes. Hotaru turned back to me, her eyes widening a little bit before coming towards me. _

"_Stupid," She muttered under her breathe before lightly taking my arm away from where she had hit me and placed her warm fingers there instead._

"_You shouldn't cry, it makes you look ugly," She said. I stared at her stunned, before nodding my head furiously._

But before anything else could happen the view suddenly disappeared making me only see darkness which I realized were because my eyes were shut. Endless tears seemed to come out and I couldn't stop them. I moved my head slightly only to realize that it was on something comfy and soft.

"Mikan!" I heard Yuu shout worriedly while shaking me. It was like I couldn't respond. My mind was so wrapped up on the flashback. I also thought that this was the only time I had fainted because of a flashback. That was bad. Was it getting worse?

"Mikan, Are you hurt? Please answer me?" He begged. I could feel him quiver under me. Wait, feel him quiver? That's when realization struck me. My head was resting upon Yuu's legs!

I suddenly felt weak. Were those flashbacks addling to my brain or something?

"Yuu," I struggled to say but he heard me.

"Yes, I'm here," Yuu said desperately. "A-Are you okay?" I felt him put a shaky hand on my forehead, probably to check if I had a fever, fortunately or unfortunately for him, I didn't.

"Y-Yes, i-it'll pass," I whispered, feeling a little better already.

"I-It'll pass? You mean this has happened before?" I didn't have to see him to know that he looked horrified. If I was in his position, I would've looked like that as well.

"Hmm," Which was my answer for yes but he didn't need to know that. I slowly fluttered my eyes open. The first thing I saw was Yuu's pale face with his eyes wide in worry. I slowly breathed in and out trying to calm myself.

"I'm okay," I reassured him. Yuu relaxed a little but not much. I groaned and started to lift my head of his lap and stood up. I quickly closed my eyes as the surroundings around me swirled around.

"H-Hey!" Yuu said worridly while putting both of his hands on my shoulders to steady me. I must have been swaying.

BBRRRIIIINGGGG

Oh, god we just missed breakfast! Now I would be starving till lunch time...and so would Yuu.

"I'm sorry," I said quietly, ashamed of myself. Even though I had changed and buried all the pain inside of me, one of the attributes that didn't change was me being selfless. I would always put people before myself.

"It's ok, you're more important than breakfast," Yuu said shyly while smiling at me before putting his hand to my forehead.

"You sure you're up to going to class?" He asked concerned, but removed his hand when he felt no signs of a fever.

"I'm fine," I said trying to wave his concern away. He gave one more skeptical look before grabbing my hand and racing out of the room and down the hallway.

I kept up with him just fine but my mind started wondering. Would I be accepted by the class? Would everyone be stuck up and mean?

We suddenly came to a stop outside a classroom which said on the door 2B.

Me and Yuu glanced at each other, and just by looking at his face I could tell that this was the first time for him ever being late for class.

I shrugged at him as he opened the door to the classroom and awaited out doom.

&

So whatcha think? I decided to make Yuu have a fairly big part since he is one of my favorite character's. R&R please. I'll update soon if it looks like people like the story.


	2. Chapter 2 Being Annoyed

Summary: My name is Mikan Sakura. Hotaru, and my parents died in a car crash a little while ago, so to get away from the memories that haunt me, I'm moving town to go to Alice Academy boarding school. Unfortunately, my life there didn't turn out exactly as I wished it too. RukaxMikan Non Alice

Well second chapter is here! :D

Natsume is definitely going to be in this story.

Also Natsume might be slightly different in this story because he never had to go on missions and has no Alice.

Chapter 2

Being Annoyed

Yuu reluctantly opened the door and instantly both Yuu and I froze. Everybody in the class was staring our way with gapping mouths, which I guessed were aimed at Yuu. Even Narumi Sensei seemed to stare.

We both walked in slowly. I gulped before we both got ready to tell Narumi Sensei our excuse. My mind went blank for a second before my eyes widened in realization that we didn't even make up an excuse and I didn't particularly want the whole class to know what had happened. Yuu seemed to have thought the same thing because he looked at me uncertain and worried. I gave him an 'You'd better not tell, or you're dead' look before glancing back at Narumi Sensei.

"Uhh..." Yuu started and scratched his head awkwardly. I inwardly hoped his excuse would be able to convince Narumi. "Sorry we're late, we had to sort out our arrangements," Narumi smiled, which I hoped it meant he believed us.

"I thought something like this might happen," Narumi Sensei said happily. My eyebrows shot up and so did Yuu's. He...knew? That was such a lie.

"What?"Both Yuu and I said in unison. Narumi smiled sheepishly.

"Nothing, nothing," Narumi sensei said waving the question off. "Yuu, go to you're seat now,"

Yuu said nothing but looked at Narumi sensei confused before walking to his seat and sat down, his eyes resting on Narumi and I.

"Everyone, this is Mikan Sakura,"Narumi sensei said happily. "Now where should you sit?" Narumi gazed around the classroom for spare seats before clapping his hands together.

"I know! How bout next to Ruka," It wasn't a question but I just hoped that this Ruka that Narumi was talking about would be nice. It was sort of ironic since I wasn't that nice now as well.

There were a couple of gasps and looks of horror from the girls but I tried to ignore it. Ruka must be pretty hot and charming then. 'Lucky me' I thought sarcastically.

"Ruka, put you're hand up," Narumi instructed. I looked around the classroom and saw a hesitant hand come up in the air. I focused on the teenager... and I was right, he was pretty hot.

Ruka was resting his face on his hand. His hair was blonde and his eyes blue. I felt like I could get lost in his eyes, but I ignored that feeling and made my way towards him.

I quickly sat down and gazed outside. In someways it felt as if I was betraying Hotaru. I winced at that thought. If she were alive what would she say in this position? 'Get over it' or would she say 'Everybody dies sometime', I literally had no idea, and just not knowing what she would say was like a stab in the back.

"Uhh..." A voice said beside me. I quickly tore my gaze away and turned to Ruka who was staring at me curiously.

"Aren't you going to listen to the teacher?" He asked quietly. I looked over at the teacher before shaking my head back and forth. I could tell Ruka was trying to make small conversation but I just didn't feel like it.

"Do you know Yuu?" Ruka asked once again trying to get me to talk but I just nodded my head.

"How?" Now he looked triumphant. Damn him! I twitched.

"I sleep with him,"I snapped. His expression froze on his face as did mine as soon as those words tumbled out of my mouth. Oh god, why did I have to say that?

"That's not what I meant," I said rushed. Ruka stared at me before slowly nodding his head.

"I'm his dorm partner," I added. He froze again.

"...What?" He got out. I rolled my eyes. Why did he have to look at me like that? It wasn't as if I had asked to be with Yuu anyway.

The rest of the lesson past fairly slowly especially with Ruka glancing at me. But then the bell went, I was saved.

I was just heading to the door when Yuu called me back. I sighed before turning around to see Yuu nearly running towards me.

"Hi," I said exasperated. Why would he want to be around me? I was so boring and plain.

"Hi, uhm, did you want to sit with me and my friends?" Yuu asked. I frowned thoughtfully. Did I?

"Who are you're friends?" I asked with no amount of enthusiasm. We both turned around and looked at the class which was still packing up.

"Well, there is Anna," He said pointing over to a girl with pink wavy hair. Said girl looked up and gave a wave before resuming putting things in her bag.

"Nonoko," He then pointed to a straight blue haired girl next to the girl called Anna.

"Kokoro, but everyone calls him koko," Yuu then pointed across the class to a cheerful brown haired guy.

"Natsume, but he's probably skipping class. There is also Hiriji (is that his first name or last name? And he is also 10 years old) , Tsubasa and Misaki, but they aren't in this class," Hmm maybe it wouldn't be that bad spending lunch time with them.

"Oh, and there is also Ruka who you've already met,"Yuu added. Ok, scrap that thought. I didn't think I could stand any more of those odd glances at me.

"I think I'll pass," I said. Yuu's face dropped but I held my answer and nothing would change it.

I spun around and went out of the classroom heading for where I think the cafeteria is. Somehow, I went in the right direction which made me thankful.

I lined up for food which only took a couple of minutes then went to a seat at the corner of the room. It was dark and shaded but I liked it and people were less likely to come over here. I sat down and started to eat a couple of gulps from the food.

I looked around me to see people laughing among themselves and talking happily. I suddenly felt envious of them. Why couldn't that be me and Hotaru? Why did Hotaru even have to die? I quickly shook my head from side to side. I wouldn't fall into self pity. If I did I would truly hate myself.

I discreetly saw Yuu and his group walk into the cafeteria near where she was seated. Yuu appeared to be talking to a black haired boy, and as curious as I was, I tried to listen hard for the conversation.

"...all alone Natsume," Yuu said appearing to be arguing with him. I suddenly felt they were talking about me, but I tried to convince myself that it was just my mind.

"No, we are not going to come over to that idiot," The guy named Natsume sneered. I winced and definitely hoped they weren't talking about me.

"But..." Yuu started.

"I agree with Yuu, look how lonely she is," Ruka commented. I suddenly felt 8 pairs of eyes on me which made me shiver. Dang, they **were **talking about me, this sucked. They were talking about me like I was some circus! And what was worse was how they felt sorry for me! I felt anger bubble within me.

"Oh for heaven's sake, I'll go over there and solve you're decision for for you then!" a girl with red hair down to her shoulders said irritated. She then started towards me determinedly. The others gapped like fishes as they stared at her and tried to whisper for her to come back but unfortunately for both me and them she didn't.

"Hey you," She called out. Knowing she was calling to me, I reluctantly turned to her and stared a little irritated.

"What?" I grouched. The girl paused in her steps for a millisecond or two before restarting again. The other's reluctantly followed behind except for Yuu who looked relieved.

"I'm Misaki, did you want to join us?" Misaki said with a smile lighting up her face.

"Not really," I mumbled. Misaki's smile faulted but managed to force it to stay.

"Well we are going to stay, right guys," She said determined but then looked behind her at her friends.

"Right guys?" She stressed on the words. There was a lot of incoherent mumbles but Misaki seemed satisfied with their response.

"Uh huh, I can see when I'm not wanted," I said rolling my eyes. But even as I said that, I felt a pang of hurt in my chest. I didn't want to care about their opinions, but I did.

I stood up and started to walk away, despite Misaki's look. A couple of metres away, I turned back to them.

"Next time you're going to gossip about me, make sure I can't hear you," I said a little harshly. They all looked embarrassed at being caught, and I noticed Ruka looking especially pink in the face.

I rolled my eyes and started to walk away.

"Wait!" Yuu called me back. I stopped but didn't turn around. A part of me wanted to be friends with them all, but the other part of me didn't want to be hurt anymore. Because if I was hurt again, I was afraid that I would be truly broken.

"Yes?" I questioned. Surprisingly enough it wasn't Yuu who answered.

"When Yuu puts his mind on something he always gets his way, and right now I think Yuu has put his mind on being you're friend," a girl I knew as Anna said with a bit of pride mixed in with her voice. I nearly groaned so I tried one last tactic.

"You won't like me," I said trying to convince them.

"I bet we will!" Misaki said. I sighed defeated. Damn how did it turn out like this?

"Fine," I mumbled before walking over to them. But even as I walked over to them I felt a twinge of happiness that people would actually want to be around me. I took pride in Yuu's happy face. At least someone was happy about me being with them.

We all sat down at a nearby table quietly. I looked around awkwardly, feeling out of place.

"So, tell us about yourself Mikan," Koko said in an attempt to get rid of the tension. But it had the absolute opposite affect. I immediately tensed and looked warily at Koko.

"What did you want to know?" I suspiciously asked.

"Uh, well do you have any friends?" Koko asked gaining incredulous glances from others. I felt a stab of emotional pain. Did he think I was such a bitch that no one would like me?

"Yeah, I had one," I snapped hurt by his question. Koko seemed a little taken aback by my sudden rage and I tried to tell myself that he didn't know that that question was really personal, but it didn't really help.

"Had?" Nonoko asked softly. The others who hadn't managed to make that connection between the words had and have seemed startled, but then looked at her with sorrow looks.

I slowly breathed in and out trying to rid the anger that was releasing itself off me. Why did they all have to be so nosy when I didn't even know them? I stared hard in my lap, so as to not look at the wondrous and pity glances that they would have sent me.

"It doesn't matter," I said quietly, but immediately regretted those words. Did I just say Hotaru didn't matter? My hands flew to my mouth in horror, while tears were brimming at the edge of my eyes.

The others looked at me confused and curious about what made me look in horror. I closed my eyes as tears were threatening to fall down my pale cheeks.

"I-I'm sorry, I just remembered something I didn't want to," My lips shook with the words that came out of my mouth. My heart clenched painfully, making me lean over and grasp the table in a strangled hold. I heard myself making strangled sobs as I tried to keep it all in. 'Please no' I thought, hoping not to end up crying with everyone near me. Why couldn't I go off and cry all alone? Why?

I quickly struggled to pull my tears back and to put an emotionless face on. Doing that was one of the hardest things I have had to do for a while.

"Are you alright Mikan?" Ruka asked, a glimmer of worry entering his eyes. I frowned. Why would he care about me? We had only just met!

"yeah, yeah," I said vaguely.

Anna then smiled but I noticed it was only half-hearted "Gosh this has been one awkward conversation," Everyone laughed except for me, which made me feel a little left out. But then, I assumed the one called Tsubasa looked at me, his face was serious.

"Give us a chance, let us be you're friends," He pleaded with me. I looked uncertainly at him then looked around and saw similar faces on everyone except for Natsume and Hiriji who just merely glanced at me curious as to what I would say.

And for the first time since Hotaru's death, a small smile graced itself upon my face.

&

Well that's the second chapter. Tell me what you think. Ok? This chapter isn't that long, so I will try to make the next chapter longer.

The next chapter, I'll try and have a bit more of Ruka in it


	3. Chapter 3 Getting to know one another

Hey guys. I haven't updated for ages!

Summary: My name is Mikan Sakura. Hotaru, and my parents died in a car crash a little while ago, so to get away from the memories that haunt me, I'm moving town to go to Alice Academy boarding school. Unfortunately, my life there didn't turn out exactly as I wished it too. RukaxMikan Non Alice.

Enjoy and Review please!!!

Chapter 3-

My smile disappeared almost immediately though. It wasn't guilt this time that was keeping me from smiling, It just felt so odd, especially when Yuu started grinning as though he had achieved something and Ruka who had a partially dazed look on his face as well as being shocked.

"So Misaki, are you going out with that guy you liked?" Nonoko asked giggling. Misaki spun around and stared at Nonoko, her face turning red. Tsubasa turned to look at her shocked and a little trifled.

"What?" Misaki spluttered before calming down and quickly glanced at Tsubasa before adding in a disappointing tone "No, not yet,"

"What? Who is it?" Tsubasa demanded. Misaki turned to look at him, her face turning red and didn't seem like she would say anything.

"BRRRRIIINNNGG" I flinched as the bell seemed to ring in my ears.

"Anyway, Tsubasa and I have got to go to Biology," Misaki quickly said before getting up and dragging Tsubasa away. I watched on as those two bickered with each other as they disappeared from my view.

"Well, Youichi, you had better get to class as well since the rest of us are in the same class," Nonoka smiled gently making Youichi frown but he headed off as well. The rest of us stood up and started heading to our class.

"So Mikan, do you wanna keep sitting with us?" Yuu asked eagerly but with a hint of worry in his eye. I didn't answer for a couple of seconds. Did I want to sit with them? Yuu's face dropped as he realized I hadn't said anything yet. He probably took my silence as a no. I hesitated.

"Yeah, okay," I spoke, pleased with how Yuu's face lit up happily.

"Really? Yeah!" Yuu spoke with a large smile. I rolled my eyes before walking into the classroom, the others following my footsteps.

"Aha! There are the happy campers!" Narumi smiled cheerfully. I looked at Narumi oddly before deciding to ignore him and walked towards my seat. I sat down and a moment later, Ruka mimicked my steps and sat in his seat beside me.

Sighing, I turned my head to the window again. Today was a lot different than what I thought it would be like. I thought everyone would just ignore me and keep to themselves but... in the end, I ended up in some group. It was refreshing in some ways since they were the first people to... even try to talk to me since ...their deaths. I imagine that I must give off some really depressing vibes so I definitely admired Yuu's courage to be my roommate.

Just then, a small bunched up piece of paper landed on my desk. I nearly jumped in surprise and my gaze shifted over to where it came from. A girl with ..... green hair? I stared at her for a second. Wow, who would want to dye their hair green? She stared at me dirtily and for a second I was taken aback. I didn't even know her and she hated me!

I turned and looked at the small piece of paper lying on my desk. I knew whatever that piece of paper had on it, that it was bad. I slowly unraveled the piece of paper and read it. My eyebrows shot up in surprise before I reread it again, thinking maybe I had read it wrong. It read:

**Stay away from Natsume and Ruka. **

**They are too good for you!**

I stared at the piece of paper before crumbling it up and put it too the side of my desk before staring out of the window again. So, on my first day I was already making enemies? Wow, what a huge achievement I thought sarcastically.

"Now class, you will be put in pairs for this assignment," Narumi grinned. I blinked unsure at what he was talking about, before deciding I would get the details later. Narumi started calling names out of who would be paired together. I didn't take notice who got paired to who except for Yuu who got paired up with Anna. I zoned out again until he reached my name.

"Mikan...you will be paired up with Ruka as you are probably getting familiar with each other," Narumi smiled. I hesitated before looking over to Ruka who was smiling at me. I unwillingly felt myself blushing before turning my head, determined not to look at him.

"Now, for the next hour until lunch, you will be working on this assignment and then have to work on it in you're own time," He spoke with a happy smile. I frowned before turning to Ruka again who seemed just as uneasy as I did.

"So...what's this assignment about?" I asked boredly. Ruka looked up at me in surprise. I must have given him a look which said 'tell me' because he immediately went on with an explanation.

"This assignment is to... know the person," I stared at Ruka uncomprehendingly. What did that mean? Ruka blushed embarrassedly before speaking up again.

"Well, I guess... we just have to get to know one another," I stared again, but this time I understood what we were doing, it just sounded a... little far fetched. He went on. "You know, I have to find out you're dislikes, likes, favorite food. That type of thing... and if you're wondering why we're doing this, well... we do this every time a new person comes, that's why he selects the partners. He pairs up the people who don't know each other very well," I still stared at Ruka unimpressed, before turning to look at Narumi who seemed like he was humming to himself.

I sighed before deciding that Ruka was serious and turned back to him who cleared his throat.

"Well.. uh... what's you're favorite animal?" Ruka asked curiously. I tilted my head before answering.

"Wolf," I told him "It represents loyalty and stability," I smiled sadly when I said 'stability'. I never liked things to change. Ruka nodded thoughtfully, although looked a bit apprehensive for a second.

I sighed, before deciding that I should just try and do the assignment.

How about you?" I asked. Ruka crinkled his eyebrows up for a second.

"A rabbit...Ruka trailed off before continuing "...but I don't know what it means..." He sighed and almost seemed to regret that he didn't know.

"The rabbit..." I said socially ,"... represents modesty" Ruka's eyes widened, almost disbelievingly.

"And how do you know that?" Ruka asked questionably. I gave him a slight grin in return.

"Knowing what animals represents is a hobby of mine. Next question," I said, feeling a little proud. Ruka thought quickly.

"What subjects are you good at?" Ruka questioned quickly as though he would lose my interest. I stared at Ruka doubtfully. What subjects was I good at? No subjects came to mind.

"Uhhh... next question..." I hesitantly said, not wanting to look like a complete idiot. Ruka looked disappointed before going to the next question.

"What's you're biggest fear?" I froze, before trying to think about about the question fashionably. My biggest fear was of losing Hotaru...but that had already happened. A deep punching feeling emerged, almost painfully. I looked away from Ruka, trying to hide the tears that were threatening to fall down and pushed the feeling away. My second biggest fear would be.... My mind came up blank. I wasn't scared off dying, wasn't scared off the dark, I wasn't even scared of when I had those flashbacks. Those felt... almost welcoming. I slowly turned back to Ruka who looked as though he wish he hadn't asked that question.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have..." Ruka started to answer regretfully.

"Nothing," I butted in. Ruka stared uncomprehendingly.

"Sorry?"

"I said I'm not scared off anything,"

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After that little conversation, things got a little more tense, but the bell soon went for lunch and I got dragged back with Yuu's group. I didn't say much, only answered when spoken to, and soon the end of lunch came. Before I knew it, the bell rang for classes to end for the day.

I yawned tiredly. The nights were harsh and full of nightmares, but I was starting to get used to them, but right now, all I wanted to do was go to sleep. Quickly I walked over to Yuu and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Hey Yuu, can you show me back to our room?" I asked quickly. I didn't particularly like relying on people anymore, but this time, it couldn't be helped. I was not going to wander around for a while just trying to find my dorm.

Yuu turned around and happily smiled "Sure," He said a quick word to the people he was talking to before heading out with me following him.

"How was you're first day?" Yuu asked, a bit unsure.

"It was fine," I said, grimacing a bit. He seemed to catch up on my mood and kept silent. I glanced at him and saw that he kept opening his mouth before closing it again.

"Did you want to say something?" I asked cautiously. Yuu turned a little pink before putting on a determined face and stopped his walking which quickly made me stop and turn back to him.

"I was... wanting to know about what happened to you today in the morning," Yuu truthfully spoke, but his voice was tinged with uncertainty and curiosity. For a moment I thought I saw a little bit of fear in Yuu's eyes, but momentarily dismissed it. He didn't even know me, it's not like he would care if something happened to me, but as I stared into his sincere gaze, I found myself wanting to be a little truthful. I sighed.

"What did you want to know?" For once Yuu's eyes were serious, and I could just imagine all the questions that he wanted to ask.

"Why did you faint?" His question was so abrupt that it startled me, but I frowned and thought of an answer.

"I'm not sure," I told him. It was truthful, but misleading. I didn't know why I had flashbacks, I just had them, although I could make many theories about why it happened. Yuu nodded slowly, but I could tell he didn't quite believe me.

"Has it happened before?" I nodded slowly and I could tell Yuu didn't particularly like my answer.

"Do you need to go to the doctors?" Yuu asked concerned, but I furiously shook my head. They couldn't do anything about it, how could they?Besides, I had already gone once and it didn't help, what was the point of going again.

"It's nothing Yuu, I've been before. There's nothing they can do to help me," I winced as those words came out of my mouth. It sounded as though I had some disease or something like that. Yuu apparently thought that as well since his face turned into one of worry.

"It's nothing... deadly is it?" Yuu hesitantly asked, his eyes begging me to tell him no. It was a good thing I wasn't terminally ill, I would have hated to say yes to that question.

"Nope, it isn't," I reassured him. I hesitated before gesturing for us to walk again. As we started walking, I almost forgot to ask him something.

"You... didn't tell anyone about what happened, did you?" I asked cautiously and hoping against all hope that he didn't mention it to any of his friends or teachers.

"No, I didn't," Yuu started sincerely. "I figured that you wouldn't want me to tell anyone," My heart rose at his answer. He seemed like such a nice person and seemed in tune with peoples feelings around him.

"Thank you," I murmured thankfully. The last thing I wanted was to have his friends all ask me what happened. Yuu smiled cheerfully.

"Ruka seems to get ruffled up by you. Not many people can do that," Yuu commented. I tensed, my face growing red. I chose not to comment on the first part.

"Who else gets him ruffled up?" I asked, trying to get the conversation to a different direction.

"Natsume. Those two are best friends," Yuu spoke. I smiled sadly as it reminded of me and Hotaru.

"Good for them," I spoke, my voice tinged with envy and loneliness.

"Ahh! We're here," Yuu said with a smile. "Did you want me to stay?" I frowned as I tried to read into whether or not he wanted to stay. Yuu just stared at me expectedly.

"Uhh... if you want," I hesitantly spoke. Yuu beamed before opening the door and we both went in. Sighing, I went over to the couch and practically collapsed on it. I rubbed my eyes tiredly before opening them and looked over at Yuu who was staring at me with a sympathetic look on his face.

"Hard first day?" He asked and I could tell he already knew the answer so I just nodded before yawning.

"If you don't mind, I think i'll go to sleep now. You can go to you're friends," I told him sleepily. Yuu blinked before nodding slowly. He walked over to the door before looking back at me.

"Our friends," Yuu spoke firmly. I stared before breaking out into a smile. Yuu opened the door before quickly closing it after he went out.

"Our friends," I whispered, overwhelmed.

I sat in silence for a while before my mind started going back to everything that had happened. Before I knew it, tears were streaming down my face. I sobbed, hiding my face in my hands. The pain of losing my family and Hotaru never died down, but maybe, jusy maybe I could move on.... just like how Hotaru would have wanted me to do.

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Well, that's it XD

How was it... I havn't updated this story for ages. I'm soooo sorry, but I'm glad I finally got this chapter up... though not much is actually happening. I just think Mikan needs to sort out her feelings a bit first.

Review Please XD

Gixie


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